tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4952050352237571556.post6578616250571110534..comments2023-10-25T08:16:38.782-07:00Comments on Of Horses and Men: too busy!sidetrackedhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16646438998655943806noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4952050352237571556.post-51639342376734451862008-06-26T06:42:00.000-07:002008-06-26T06:42:00.000-07:00Hi, You have an interesting blog. I have just rece...Hi, <BR/>You have an interesting blog. I have just recently found blogging and think I could get addicted!<BR/>Some rambling thoughts, comments,ideas...<BR/>Love the idea of men and animals, humans can learn a lot from them.<BR/>While reading your journal and the comments, several things came to mind.<BR/>What precipitated the break up? I have found that most breakups take two. <BR/>Maybe some questions for you to think about ...kind of like a Pros and Cons list ...<BR/>What are the things you can not (and I really mean Should not) live with about G? What are the things he can not live with about you?<BR/>What was going on in your lives when things turned bad?<BR/>Can both of you forgive and forget?<BR/>For some reason, it seems men have a very hard time living without a women in their lives. :) Maybe because women can do it all, and men can't. That is not a good reason for men to jump from one sl** to another ...maybe one reason there are so many divorces now.<BR/>Does G understand alcoholism? Since it is in your field, maybe you could get him some literature to help him understand it. <BR/>I think it is wonderful that you have your animals, but make sure you get out with humans, too. Not to vent or focus on G, but so that you enjoy life to the fullest.<BR/>Do what feels right for you and no one else.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4952050352237571556.post-57669697845457584422008-06-26T05:13:00.000-07:002008-06-26T05:13:00.000-07:00Stephanie gosh did you marry my ex? I firmly beli...Stephanie gosh did you marry my ex? I firmly believe that for most people it takes a life altering experience to change - near death or untimely death of someone close to them, financial ruin you know the BIG stuff. Anyway it took me 10 years to get out of a bad situation and Stephanie your last paragraph for 10+ years was the sorry of my life - Sidetracked don't make it yours too. <BR/><BR/>The older you get the more time fly's and you can't get it back - gawd I DO sound like my Mom!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4952050352237571556.post-5277809037637518712008-06-25T16:34:00.000-07:002008-06-25T16:34:00.000-07:00oh - I didn't really understand about the other 2 ...oh - I didn't really understand about the other 2 girls that were/weren't in the picture - sorry for assuming he was doing something bad...<BR/><BR/>I hope things work out for you, one way or another. Relationships sure aren't easy. I would probably die if I was out in the dating world - it's a scary place.<BR/><BR/>I guess it just makes me a bit sad to hear when people are having relationship troubles - whether married or not... A few drinks are fun sometimes, but not when it turns into saying things you don't remember/don't mean - or maybe do.<BR/><BR/>That's tough for both of you. I wish I could help somehow!Laurahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01736592362765508427noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4952050352237571556.post-36572548232212861232008-06-25T15:26:00.000-07:002008-06-25T15:26:00.000-07:00Grown-up conversations are good. Better than drunk...Grown-up conversations are good. Better than drunken or tired ones or ones that are one sided as one part shuts down. <BR/>I was figuring it was something else that ended it. But if it was because you were both miserable with each other - that's where the Law came from. Me and hubby's relationship cycles like that - he'll push me to the point where I break down and am walking out the door then he'll back down act all nice maybe even go to counseling and it will last for a while but goes right back to being a self-centered ass. <BR/><BR/>Not trying to vent too much here - but his latest thing is to get to drinking on Friday (and not having slept for about 24 hours) night and then get to complaining about what a crappy wife I am. The next morning he says he remembers nothing, or he'll blow it off like nothing happened. When awake and not drinking I can't drag any of these issues out of him for an "adult conversation".Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00029307154132762913noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4952050352237571556.post-25012974336668592212008-06-25T11:07:00.000-07:002008-06-25T11:07:00.000-07:00Thanks everyone for your comments. I really do ap...Thanks everyone for your comments. I really do appreciate all of the good advice and read every single one. The "G" thing is tough for me because I just can't control my heart and how I feel. I truly feel that were are both going through a tough time in our lives. And for the record he never cheated on me when we were together, he is not like that at all! He just messed around with convenient store girl and mud run girl when we were broken up. It still hurts but I also had a fling and figured out that it just wasn't me and I needed something more. I see so much potential in him and it's up to him to tap into that. He's showing some growth now and thats why I think a week break with no commounication is good. Let him clear his head. Let me get on with work and moving and horses. We both went through a list on the phone last night about what we want out of life. It was amazing the similiarties and then we talked about how we were going to achieve those goals. It was actually a very grown up conversation. But I am listening to you and keeping my heart guarded for now.sidetrackedhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16646438998655943806noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4952050352237571556.post-35436087890281881292008-06-25T10:00:00.000-07:002008-06-25T10:00:00.000-07:00Lots of stuff to cover in this post! Too bad abou...Lots of stuff to cover in this post! Too bad about the heat stroke at the show - that is no fun.<BR/><BR/>Congrats on getting that apt., I hope you and your friend enjoy your time there. Having your own space is nice.<BR/><BR/>And the "G" thing - I totally agree with Stephanie - be careful with him. There are so many decent guys out there that won't cheat/drink/stretch the truth that you might be able to meet instead of re-hashing a history of weird behaviour with this guy. <BR/><BR/>But what do I know? I've been married for 9 years to the nicest guy ever. I wouldn't change a thing about him.<BR/><BR/>I hope it all works out in whatever way is best for you - sorry for an "assvice" - I don't mean it in that way...<BR/><BR/>Steph - sorry to hear that you don't have the best situation at home...Laurahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01736592362765508427noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4952050352237571556.post-2565801994657353582008-06-25T08:22:00.000-07:002008-06-25T08:22:00.000-07:00My parents have a lake cabin like that too - lots ...My parents have a lake cabin like that too - lots and lots of good memories.<BR/><BR/>Be cautious with "G" things - like that dirty closet or tack room - always tend to return to their original state. Its a law of the universe. You clean it up and then before you know its the same again. <BR/><BR/>I know you miss him but if you didn't want that before you most likely still don't. I'm not saying he can't change - because some guys can - though they are few and far between. Another law of the universe is that you can't change men - if they change its very difficult for them and they have to do it themselves and it rarely happens.<BR/><BR/>I am often confronting this in my marriage - i have remind myself that if I can't accept the way he is now then I need a divorce and I have to make that decision - can I deal with this? forever? <BR/><BR/>I used to gallop my horses out on the train too - was so fun, I miss that. Sometimes I would tap speeds I didn't know they had. Maybe someday I will be able to do that again.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00029307154132762913noreply@blogger.com