Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Helloooooo, is anybody there?

This is basically what people are asking me as my posts are now a week apart. So to put everyone's mind at rest I am doing fine. I have been battling a nasty cold for over 8 days now. Last weekend I hung out with my parents and then sure enough on Monday I felt like shit. It was so bad that I either worked from home when I could so I could lay down and drink hot tea or called in sick most of last week. It literally wiped me out and I am still coughing a little with the sniffles, but am feeling much better comparitively. So due to this cold I havn't been riding much or if i have it's been pretty short just to stretch both of our legs. Yesterday I finally felt better enough to do an actual ride. We worked on some endurance on the trail with lots of cantering and trotting and then when we got back to the barn we jumped a few jumps and puttered around. After riding I gave hom a treat while I brushed him and then put on his rain sheet since the weather that night was calling for rain and yes even SNOW! I am so not ready for that stuff yet. After letting him back out in the paddock I snuck through the fence and just chilled with him in the grass. Wherever I walked he followed, it was kinda cool. I gave him lots of pats and hugs and just enjoyed spending time with him.

I got home and then showered and changed since a "friend" had asked me to dinner. I know I know, everyone's interest has just perked up, but it's not as great as it seems. This guy friend and I are simply just that and maybe a little more, but in terms of feelings it is strictly just friends. Basically we are just both a little lonely and not in relationships and enjoying each others company, Kapish? So it was kind of out of the blue that he would ask me to dinner since that's not usually our deal. And to be honest I have been kind of avoiding him lately because I am really starting to have feelings for the Minnesota guy. But I was kinda cornered yesterday and really had to say yes to dinner. Plus this guy friend and I really are friends so it wasn't that bad, plus we have known each other for many years so it was cool. But I couldn't help but feel a slight twinge of sadness. Like I was hoping it was my Minnesota guy that I was chillin with instead of this guy friend. My MN friend and I talk literally 5 times a day. We talk about anything and everything and we can talk for hours. He's sweet and nice and has his life together for the most part blah blah I know you guys have heard it all before. However he is not in a position to date anyone right now. He is in the process of a divorce after a seperation and has kids so I really don't want to be in the mix, and plus it's not my place to be either. (FYI he got married 10 yrs ago when his gf got pregnant and obviously it's not working out) But we talk all the time and it's great. He picks me up during the day and he tells me I do to him too. I really look forward to talking to him and we just seem to click. I know we're 1600 miles away with some obstacles to get through, but boy does this feel good. He's honest and up front, almost brutally honest. He hasn't been happy in a long time and was basically staying in the marriage just for show and then finally couldn't take it anymore. He then came to Maine just looking to get away for a while and get out of the situation and have fun and that's when we met. Neither one of us planned this at all and neither one of us were looking. I was just getting over the Summer of Molly and having fun and he was getting settled into the single life of just himself. He is by no means a player, it makes me laugh a little because of how little experience he has had, but it's cute all in the same hand. SO I really don't know what is going to happen. I have no expectations and we communicate effectively about it all the time so it's good to not have any secrets. Just taking this really slow and "holding my horses" so to speak hahaha. All I know is that as of this time I am not really interested in anyone and am just sitting in neutral seeing what the universe has to bring me. Patience is not a virtue of mine so this is good for me mentally and emotionally just to cool my heels.

Well I think that's about all. It's raining today and I'm not going to ride since I'm still not feeling 100%. I think it's gonna be a clean the apartment evening, vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom, folding clothes etc...real fun. Plus I need to catch up on everyone's blogs since I've been offline for a bit. Have a great day everyone.

1 comment:

Leah Fry said...

Glad to hear you're OK. I'll be interested to see how things go with MN Cowboy.