Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Post Party Update

Well the party was a big success. There were tons of horses, people and food. The temp was a rare 50 degrees which was the best thing of all. At one point we had 16 horses and riders in the ring. When I went to go get Possum from the paddock he was a little stocked up behind. I gave him a good grooming and checked him all over and couldn't find any obvious signs for him stocking up. I took him to the indoor and rode him around at a walk to get the blood flowing. I then put him in the barn and ate some food and watched a couple of games. Before the high jump we participated in pole bending. This is not one of his good events. We did make it though, but it wasn't pretty and nor was it the best time.

When the jumping started I could tell right away that he was full of himself, which is suually a good sign but he was being sloppy. I don't know if it was because he aw maybe a little stiff behind from being stocked up or just too hyper, but he was racing towards the jumps. He would throw his head up in the air to avoid the bit and charge to the jump and literally throw himself over it. Jumping flat and on the forehand instead of sitting back and rocking on his haunches for a good take off. I have to admit that I was a little pissed, but you have to just chalk it up to a bad day. We were eliminated at 4'1". No one was able to break the past years record of 4'6". Afterwards I put the jump to 5ft just for shits and giggles and tried to jump it. The first two times he stopped abrubtly, and once I almost came off as he slid to a stop and then ducked to the side. Luckily I still have a few instincts left and was able to control myself from tumbling off. The last time I brought him to the jump I made the mistake of thinking that he might stop and was nt ready when he heisitated and then started to launcy over it. I got caught behind and definately sat back on his back as I threw my arms forward in hopes of not catching him in the mouth. It was not pretty by far and I let him stop there ona valiant effort. I gave him lots of pats and a good rub down and promised that I would ride him more so we were both in better shape. Everyone had a great time and it was all smiles.

As for the guy situation. "G" has decided that he is going to be mad at me this time and it not really speaking, which is fine with me. We both have to get over this in our own way and maybe this is the best thing for him. As for Greg, I just can't find anything bad about this guy. I am still trying very hard to keep my feelings to myself and keep it on a friend level with no strings, but man I really like him!! My roomie and I are cooking a big dinner to have tomorrow night and Greg and his son might come over to eat with us which will be nice.

I'm battling a wicked cold right now and am just so tired all the time. I'm having a hard time getting up in the morning. Luckily tomorrow is the last day of work this week due to the new year holiday. It'll be nice to relax and chill because this upcoming month is going to be crazy busy with school educations and drop in hrs.

As for the saving money for the ranch trip, it's slow going because I'm still paying off all my bills. But I hope to really stick to it. My roomate might go as well and I think it could just be an awesome time. Well have a good rest of the week and a happy new year if I don't write till then.

Friday, December 26, 2008

Greetings on a Friday day off

Merry Christmas everyone. I had a good time at my parents the other day and got some awesome gifts. It was good to visit with family and totally stuff myself with yummy food. I got n awesome rain coat made of Gore Tex that my mom got on sale. I left my last raincoat at the horse track this fall when I was marshaling the races so I've been without one for a while. My mom actually even got me some riding gloves and some winter gloves for the barn which was cool. I got a Sweatshirt with a cool shadow of a horse on it that says Fryeburg Fair, and of course the most useful gift of all, MONEY!!! I'm going to pay off some bills and then start saving for my trip out west.

The ranch that I'm hoping to go to with Greg an possibly my roomate is the 71 Ranch in Nevada. I keep looking at the website and drooling over the slide show and reading every page detail through detail.

I'm looking forward to the barn party tomorrow. The weather is supposed to be warm in the 30's with no snow predicted. I have a funny story to shre. The other night before Christmas my roomate and I went to the barn to check on our horses and put on extra blankets. We decided to just ride bareback with bridles in the arena to stretch their legs a little. Possum is always a little jumpy with his bareback and you have to be careful. Well I just got done telling my friend that watch he'll try and buck or something when I tried to get on, and no sooner did I try and lay a leg across and was competely sideways on his back due to the many layers that I was wearing when he let out this huge buck. He didn't move other than his hind legs. I was very proud of myself I didn't even lose a little balance. I quickly swung my leg over and he curled his neck up and arched his back and pranced off. I could feel the energy coursing through body. Needless to say we only did some walking and trotting and then I got off and lunged him at liberty to let him blow off some steam. He is just so funny that he makes me laugh all the time. I was also pleased to see that even flying changes on his own are getting much better when he turns and spins or cuts across the arena. It was good to see him and feed him treats and his dinner. I rearranged his blankets so that he was all comfy and toasty.

Today is pretty much a lazy day. Last night I went to the movied with Greg, his brother and my roomate. We went back to his place and had a good time and I ended up crashing there. "G" has just been giving me grief lately and it's kinda stressing me out. So I havn't even taken a shower yet and am just playing on the computer and watchin TV. Somestimes it's good just to be lazy and chill. Well have a great day everyone. Hopefully will have a lot of funstories to share tomorrow after the barn party. I can't wait!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

bad horsey mom

Let me just say that Maine is such a weird state to live in weather wise. We had another biggish storm Friday night. And now as I type this on a Sunday evening we are predicted to get between 10-18 inches. We have already gotten nearly a foot so far. The snow is coming down so fast that the plows can't even keep up with it. The barn owner called this morning and said that they were postponing the barn party until after Christmas because of the weather and the fact that it would be unsafe for people to drive in it, I totally agree with her decision. But that means one more day of not seeing my pony. I can just imagine him now all bundled in his blankets in the shelter with his buddies snoozing while the storm rages.

My roomate and I went over to Gregs house since he did not have his son today and while he watched football we played upstairs on the big screen with video games. It was actually really fun. We also brought all the dogs along for a little added excitement. We then watched a movie and braved the drive home which is usually 20 minutes but it took us about an hour!!! We drove slow and carefully and made it home safe and sound.

SO now we're getting ready to watch Home Alone and get in to the Christmas spirit. I did not go shopping yesterday so now I have to go after work sometime this week which is fine because I know what I need to get but it's just a matter of driving down there and getting it. Jusr wanted to check in tonight and let you all know that if you saw the weather report that I'm fine and so are the horses. I do plan to get to the barn before Christmas and bring Possum his treats as well. SO have a good nighe everyone and I'll check in later.

Friday, December 19, 2008


I am so excited that it's Friday. That means the work week is ending and school vacation is starting. I have a very slow week next week due to school not being in session so I have some time to catch up and go through more curriculum. I'm trying to get myself motivated to ride this afternoon after work. I really should put in atleast a little ride before the big party Sunday. Oh and Sunday we're supposed to get more snow, just under a foot, oh joy! (Not).

I'm pissed because Possum has ripped his hood off his blanket and taken the rings with it and I have not yet fixed it. I feel like a bad horse mom since he has a strip of clipped hair under his neck. Granted it is growing in quickly and he is not shivering or anything, but still I bought the damn hood for a reason!!! I need to try and fix that tonight so he can have it on before we get any more snow.

My dogs are doing great and they are my best friends. They hang out on the couch with me in the afternoons and sleep with me at night. I even brought Jetta and Abby over to Greg's house the other night so that his son could visit with them. He fell in love and cried the night after because I couldn't come over with the dogs again. He's such a sweet kid. Speaking of Greg, things are still going strong. I find that the more time I spend with him the more and more I like him. I was talking to him the other day about my dream of going to a real cattle ranch out west and he said that he would love to do that as well. I almost fell out of my chair. "G" would have rather have had his right arm cut off then go to a ranch with me. SO I took it seriously and started to do some research. I am totally serious about this and am hoping to save some money so that I can go in the fall. Greg is all on board, imagine how fun that would be!!! He just keeps amazing me with he generosity and kindness. He may even come to the barn party on Sunday which would be totally cool that he would be taking an interest in what I love doing. But as I am always reminding mydrlf, take it slow girl, there's no rush.

Well that's about it on the horse and guy news. I will definately have more to write after Sunday. Saturday I have designated as Christmas shopping day since I have not even started. Money is just so tight and I am one of those girls that just hates shopping, unless it has anything to do with horses hehehe. So stay tuned I may have a new jumping record to share or maybe a good spill to admit, we'll see.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Hey All

Sorry it's been so long since I've posted, I've just been lazy about typing lately. I went to the barn Monday night with my roomie. The temps were in the 50's which is insane for this time of year. We've been getting snow, ice, rain and now warm weather. As I type this today it has currently snowed 6in and is very cold. Maine is just a crazy place to live in the winter. So Monday went well. I rode for about an hour and a half. We worked on some solid flat work and he was actually doing very well and was quite supple. I worked on some lateral work and shoulder ins which he did quite well. I then trotted a few jumps and he was OK. He and I both hate trotting jumps even though it's really good for us. We tried cantering some courses, but damn it all he turned into a speed demon again. It wasn't until almost the end of our ride that he started to calm down and steady up. At the end of the ride I put one of the jumps to 3'9" and he went right over it a few times, only rubbing it once and causing it to fall. When I was finished I let the barn owners daughter cool Possum out. She really likes to walk him around on his back, and he really seems to like her as well. It's really cute to see them together.

Possum also managed to rip his hood off and I found it in the woods up against the electric fence. Somwhow he ripped the rings out of the blanket so now Ihave to find a way to sew all three back on. I gave him a few treats after giving him his grain and turned him back out. It was nice to spend some time with him and work together.

This coming Sunday I am so excited because it is our annual holiday barn party with food, drinks, games and ofcourse the highj ump competition which I am totally psyched for. I have to tell you that it has always been my dream to jump 5ft. The highest that we have gone is 4'6" so I'm hoping that we can break a record on Sunday as long as my nerves don't get the best of me. Either way it's a good time with good friends and ofcourse horses.

As for the guy front, things are steadily marching on. "G" is still kinda stressing me out and really wants to get together, but really I think that I'm done. As for Greg we are just getting to be better and better friends as each day passes. We talk all the time and are each others cheering section when someone gets us down, such as the ex's. Oh and one last thing.......Last weekend I got my nose pierced. I have never had anything pierced in anything in my life including my ears so this was a big step. I have always thought that they were pretty cool and I just wanted a small stud. So here I am.........

Well that's about all. Been busy at work but it's been a good busy. Still need to START my Christmas shopping so that's my plan for this weekend besides the Christmas party ofcourse. Looking forward to spending some tigme with Greg as well this weekend. I just find him so attracting and such a good person. SO have a great rest of the week. I'll try harder to write again. I just finished cleaning the apartment from the mess all of the dogs have made with their toys and managed to vacuum so I'm pretty motivated right now. Have a good night.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Wednesday Ramblings

Well it's Wednesday, otherwise known as hump day. Not too much going on other than the crazy weather here in the northeast. It was in the single digitgs for temps this past weeekend and it is now 55 degrees outside. The weather is absolutely crazy!! I came home from work early to get some presentations ready for Friday for a visit from a large funding source that is coming to visit and learn more about our program, nothing like a little pressure or anything. My roomie has the day off and decided to go to the barn, even though it's raining cats and dogs. Greg is here at the funeral home fixing the water problem and cleaning up. It was good to see him. He called me earlier to talk about issues with his ex and the grief that she is putting him through. I'm glad that I can be such a good friend to him when he needs it. Saturday we might actually be going on a real date to L.L. Bean late in the night since it's open 24/7 and we thought it would be fun to go in the middle of the night, nothing like a little adventure. That's one of the things that I really like about him, he's up for almost anything.

As far as the horse front is concerned, I havn't done much since the beach this weekend. I hate to sound like an idiot, but really the weather has been frustrating me and I don't really feel like doing much. I did come home last night and cleaned the bathroom and washed my bedding. I never realize until I clean out the lint trap in the dryer how much hair my dogs really shed, it's quite a bit and really washing my bed once a week is a necessity. But I love my dogs and wouldn't trade them for anything in the world, they are really my best friends and they come first, along with my horse and cat ofcourse!!

"G" also came by this afternoon to take the dogs for the day since he had the day off and I'm trying to get things done in terms of work. He was really happy to see them, but ofcourse it was a tense meeting since Greg was also here working downstairs at the house. They didn't see each other but ofcourse I didn't keep it a secret that they were both going to be here, I really have nothing to hide and right now I am just friends with them and they both know that.

Not much going on otherwise. Have a busy day tomorrow so far. We are expected to have quite a big snow and ice storm tomorrow and into Friday which is always nice when you have to drive for work in this crap. One of the things I found out when I started this job that we have snow days and if the weather is really bad then they will cancel work with pay which is really cool since I really hate driving in this crap even though I'm used to it and also have studded snow tires. The bulk of my driving in the week is on Friday so we'll see what the weather has to bring. Have a good day everyone and stay safe.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Riding and more Riding

Finally I have gotten my lazy ass to ride some more this weekend despite the literally freezing temps. Saturday my roomate and I went to the barn i nthe daylight and had a good ride in the indoor. There weren't that many people there so it was nice to not only get in some good flat work, but also worked on trotting and cantering some lines and courses. As always Possum was a speed demon, but eventually he settled down and we had some nice hunter rounds to the jumps. It was so cold atthe barn that by the time wer were ready to leave my ass was throughly frozen hahaha. It was a good time and I always love riding my horse and hangin with him.

Then Saturday night I went over to Gregs and we watched a movie and I ended up falling asleep. I woke up early Sunday to come home and shower and let the dogs out and then went to the barn to get ready to ride at the BEACH!!! Yes you heard me right. My old trainer called me and asked if I wanted to go to the beach Sunday, Hell Ya!!! She also had to do a demo at Cabella's because they were having a horse day and she as going to talk about camping with horses. So she picke dme up at 9AM and we drove the hour to the ocean. It was cold and snowing, but despite the weather it was still beautiful. It was low tide but the waves were crashing. I put Possum's quarter sheet on and away we went. I had such a blast. I quickly warmed up as we started riding. Possum was wonderful and full of energy. The footing was absolutely perfect and we basically had the entire beach to ourselves. We rode for a couple of miles and rode under the pier and then turned around and rode back. It was really so much fun. We opened the horses up once and Possum kicked the pants off her quarter horse hehehehe. Possum and I just have so much fun together. It's amazing the communication that can occur from simple body language and the exchange of energy. It's like we know whet each other is thinking. We even chased down a few sea gulls which is always fun.

Then we loaded up the horses and drove to Cabella's for the demo. It was still slightly snowing and we had a bit of a hard drawing a crowd. SO I put a bridle on Possum and got on bareback and rode to the front of the store. Immediately tons of people and kids came over to see and pat him. He took it all in stride and was basically falling asleep. Here we are in the middle of the city with cars and people and a trolly for transportation and we were camped right out near the huge moose statue. The Cabella's people even came out and took our picture for their newsletter which was cool. The demo went well and we loaded up the horses and my friend dropped Possum and I off at the barn. I had so much fun and my back was only marginally sore. I came home and took a hot shower and basically laid in bed for the rest of the night relaxing. The pic below I quickly snapped on my camera phone in the parking lot at the beach. You can see the snow coming down. It was really pretty.

Today it is now currently 5 degrees and I have no intention of going outside. I'm still a little chilled from yesterday even though I was dressed warm. So I had a nice horsey weekend and even got to spend some good time with Greg which was nice. I just ave so much fun with him and feel like we can talk to hours. SO I'm looking forward to a good work week and getting a lot done. Have a great day everyone.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Picture and Update Time!!

Happy Wednesday to everyone. I have started my day early getting to work just a little after 6AM! I've already been to the local highschool and given a presentation and am planning on leaving early today since I've been balls to the wall this week so far and it's only Wednesday. I have presentations an hr away all day tomorrow and then Friday is busy again until the afternoon. But work is good and I'm loving it. The Pics above are my dog Phin that I snapped when he was playing with my roomie's dog. Don't mess with him!!! He's my attack dog. He's my best friend and spent all last night spooning me, no really he was. He was sleeping on my side of the bed and I had to take the other side, he's the only one that I would do that for. Doesn't he look all cute and cuddly from the pics ?hehehehe.

My friend Greg's ex-wife is flipping out on him still. She's talking like he and I are going to move in with each other and I'm gonna take over the mother role of their son and oh yea Greg and I are going to have a kid together. Can we say what the fuck!!!!! This woman is deperate and lonely and rerally needs to mental health support. That's about all I;m gonna say about that.

Last night myt roomie and I went to the barn to have a nice ride and took all the dogs. The weather wasn't too cold and it was fun having the arena to ourselves. We blasted the music and went about our businessl Possum was great. I've really been trying to work on both of our endurances. I also did some jumping. Lots of trotting at first and then cantering some. He was a freakin speed demon and was charging towards the jumps at mach speed. No one can say that this horse does not like jumping. Then my roomie put some of the jumps up. She put one all the way up. I was feeling confident and said that I would jump it just once. It actually looked big but I thought it was only due to the fact that I just hadn't jumped in a while. He sailed over it with incredible power. Then when it was my roomie's turn she chickened out and put it down a hole. I couldn't help feel as we sailed over the jump that "I still got it!!!" I gave Possum lots of pats and let him cool out ending on that. After the ride we went and found a measuring tape and gosh darnet with it not all of 4'6" that we jumped, I guess it really was as big as it looked! My roomate is doing a lovel job modeling in front of the jump below.

As you can also see from the pic below Possum is getting a little bit of a belly even with having a trace clip you can see that he is not hurting for pounds. This is the incentive that I have to trim some off him and also from myself. I think it's almost time to get back into regular work, working up slowly to the level we were doing. But I did manage to make him match last night in all pink with his saddle pad and front polos. He looks really enthused in the pic too hahaha.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Nice Long Weekend

Had a pretty good long weekend with spending Thanksgiving in Boston with the family. It all went OK but I was glad to get out of the car with driving 6 hours with my parents and it just killed me, with them setting the speed control at exactly the speed limit of the highway. The drama continues with "G". He keeps professing his love to me, but really and I told him this I just have nothing else to give to him, the tank is empty. The other Greg and I are having fun hanging out. His ex wife now knows that we are hanging out as she went through his phone this morning while he was bringing their son to day care. His ex wife works out of their home and is waiting for her transfer to have another base to work out of. Greg was cool about it and told her that he liked me and we talk and have a good time but that neither one of us are in need of a relationship and just need to be friends right now. From what he tod me she took it well, but them proceded to blame Greg for why her new boyfriend won't talk to her now. Some people are so messed up.

I got out and rode Possum Saturday and it was fun. My back held up well and I worked on building up my endurance which has really been lacking since the broken back incident. It was good to see him and also extra good to have him trace clipped so I didn't have to stay for hours afterwards cooling him out. He really is such a good horse, I can go from riding him every day to once every week and he is still great for the most part. He doesn't offer to rear or buck.l He lets me know when he has extra energy and we work accordingly. I didn'[t really do much jumping since my body was in agony after not riding consistently.

Tonight I'm going back to the barn and gonna ride with my roomate under the lights in the indoor. Work has been really busy which is a good thing. I'm still really liking this job and so excited it's still working out.

Well don't really have much time to chat heing busy and all. I'll check in again tomorrow afternoon. I have a healthy relationships presentation tomorrow AM at a middle school so that should be interesting. You never know what kids that age are going to do.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

musings on growing up....

Why is it that playing was so easy as a kid and everything was always new and exciting and filled with wonder. Do we really have to lose this as we get older?! Sure as an adult you have tons of responsibility and bills and planning and jobs and family etc... Sometimes I will get that feeling that I used to get when I was younger, especially around horses; like my senses are heightened. The sweet smell of their breath, the touch of their fur, their gentle breathing and the feel of whiskers on your cheek as you lean in for a soft kiss. These are all things that I sometimes take for granted and just go about my daily duties. I remember how excited I used to get to even just see and touch horses nevermind ride them. I want to bring things back to the way they used to be.

I don't want to walk around all day murmuring about schedules and meetings and money and what to have for dinner that night. I want to take every minute as something new and a challenge and even an adventure. For example, I'm dreading going to Boston with my parents for Thanksgiving because of the long drive and the fact that they set their speed control on the highway to 65 which happens to be the exact speed limit. I'm just thinking about what time I'm gonna be home and the hassle of the day in general. Flash back to about 15 yrs ago. I would have been jumping out of my seat to hang with my cousins and visit and chat. I would have begged my parents to leave earlier and come home later. Why does it have to be like this when we get older?

My goal as of now is to try and get some of those feelings back. Focusing on having fun and not taking days for granted just to get to another one. I want to take my riding back to the basics and continue to work on my relationship with my horse and have fun. I don't want to get all caught up in training and showing as it takes the personal aspect of riding and horse ownership. I want to take things back to when I was a kid while also juggling the responsibilities of an adult. Can it work? I don't know but stay tuned.

As for the daily dish. My roomie left to go up north to visit with family last night. Yesterday was her birthday and the idiot didn't even tell me until that night because she doesn't want to make a big deal of it, whatever! So we went and had a quick dinner before she hit the road. I spent some time with the dogs and then went to Greg's and spent the night. We had a good time chatting and teasing one another. The more time I spend with him the more I like him every day. He even made the comment to me last night about the fact that I'll get sick of him sooner or later. I actually took offense to that as it is the complete opposite of how I feel. I just need to remember to cool my jets and take it a day at a time, as mentioned above. I tend to like to get ahead of myself. It's like reading the last chapter of a book. Sure you know what happens at the end, but you miss out on all the good stuff in the middle and the actual story itself. Why do I do this to my life? Anyways, enough heavy thinking. I'm gonna get back to work and enjoy the next 4 days of a great family holiday.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Welcome to Maine!

Got up bright and eary this morning from a really good nights sleep and look outside and it is a slushy, snowy, rainy and most of all icy mess! "shit" I say outloud to no one in particular except my black cat Shadow who is resting comfortably on the bed looking at me in a mocking tone for the fact that he can stay all snuggled up in bed and I need to go to work. I slowly ambled to the shower with towel in hand. To make matters worse I have a scratchy throat and a stuffy nose. I'd be lying if I said the thought of staying home didn't cross my mind. I stayed extra long in the shower soaking up all the hot water that I could. Due to the conditions of the road I knew I had to give myself some extra time so hurried through my morning routine. The dogs were with "G" due to a funeral today so I was able to save time on not letting them out. I went out to start my car in my robe and quickly dressed and drove the 20 min to my first school by 7:30am.

Last night I stopped home and let all the dogs out to go to the bathroom and then packed all 4 of them up in my car and I headed to my parents to pick up Possum's hood to attach to his blankiet since the barn owner called yesterday to let me know she had just trace clipped him. I went and had a little dinner at my parents, picked up the hood and drove to the barn. I got Possum out and gave him a good grooming. His trace clip looked really good. There's nothing like the attractiveness of a half clipped appy, but what can you do. I could tell he was hyper as he was daqncing in the cross ties and snaking his head around. I out the chain on him and led him to the indoor. I hopped on bareback and couls immediately feel the electricity coursing through his body. His back was tight as a drum and wouls hunch up at tje slightest moment. He was doing all he could do to behave. I walkewd hin for about 10 minutes and tried a little trot. he pranced sideways and shook his head and arched it to almost touching his neck. I made the decision to get off and let him play a little on the lunge since there was a olesson going on and I couldn't just turn him loose. He took off after I clipped the line and moved him into the circle. I had to smile and chuckle as he squealed and farted. He wasn't being bad and I knew he just couldn't hold onto all that energy any longer. I softly thanked him for not exploding when I was on him. He quicly settled down and I put him through his paces in both directions.

I then walked him back to the barn and gave him another good brushing and put both of his new boankets on plus his hood. The weather I knwe was supposed to be nasty for the next few days so I wanted to make sure he was plenty warm enough especially after being clipped now. I gave him a quik treat and a kiss on the forehead and turned him out. I then brought the dogs to "G's" for the night and went home and chatted with my roomie and one of her friends. I talked to Greg before literally passing out at 11pm.

Have actually been busy todday at work despite the miserable weather which is good. I even got to have a Thanksgiving feast at the last school I went to which was awesome and I was able to really connect with a lot of students. Anyways, that's about all for today. Don't think I'll go see Possum tonight since I feel kinda crappy and the weather is the same. Have a good day everyone. The ski areas are alreqady open around here too which means that winter is just about here! Stay warm and stay safe and make sure your horsies are comfortable.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Cold Everywhere

Well I'm back from my trip to Virginia. I had a lot of fun and was able to visit a lot with family that I don't get to see often, and also see me 23yo cousin married off. Just the thought of even getting married right now at 27 scares the shit out of me. But if she's happy and ready to settle down, more power to her.

So it was a lot of late nights in the lounge and bar area and lots of yelling to hear over one another. I also got to chill in the pool and hot tub a few times which was nice. The wedding was short and sweet; just the way I like it and the reception had to end at around 9P due to the fact that another wedding reception was scheduled. Now to the weather. I was hoping, praying and expecting temps to be atleast a little higher than home in Maine. Well it was literally freezing. There was frost on the cars in the morning and it even spit snow which is crazy, this is the south and not even in the moutains, it's on the coast. So needless to say my skimpy strapless dress was not quite warm enough in the weather and wind. Ohwell. I was happy to come home and see my dogs and my roomate.

I basically picked up my dogs last night ran home, dropped my things, took a quick shower and scratched each of the kids and then drove to Greg's to hang out for a while before I passed out from exhaustion. I was so tired because the night before I stayed up until 4am hangin with family and others at the hotel and watching everyone get drunk and being silly. I had a lot of fun, but only managed to get about 3hrs of sleep, so I was basically running on fumes last night. It was good to see Greg and I realized how much I missed talking to and seeing him on a regular basis. He said that he also missed me and it was his idea that I come over. That made me happy.

Got up early this morning and got gas and went home to let the dogs out and hang with them for a bit. Then took a quick shower, threw laundry in the washer, let the dogs out again and jetted out the door to work. I admit that I'm wicked tired today and can only think about taking a good long sleep in my comfy bed with my animals, but unfortunately the funeral home has visiting hrs tonight so the dogs need to vacate the premisis for a bit, not sure where we're going to go, but somewhere for a few hrs.

I'm glad that this is a short work week. I just found out that I also have Friday off so I'm psyched! I also have a relatively light week in terms of work due to school winding down and getting ready for the holiday. Next week is a different story alltogether, so I'll take advanatage of the slow time now. I'll be going to Boston for Thanksgiving to visit with more family and then driving back the same day which will suck, but atleast it's only one day and I'll get to spend more time with my cousins.

As for news on the horse front, there have been zero. Possum has been trace clipped and before I left last week I dropped off his stable blanket to go under his mid weight turnout. I forgot his hood at my parents house, but maybe that will give me something to do tonight since the weather the next few days is calling for wet and cold rain and I'd like to have him all bundled up since he lives outside with a shelter. I miss my Possum and he deserves a good grooming tonight from his mother. OK, so that's it, I made up my mind. The dogs and I are going to drive to my parents and get Possum's hood and then go to the barn where I'll give him a good grooming and make sure he is dressed right. Well I better get back to work. Talk to you all tomorrow.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Have a Happy Tuesday

It's Tuesday and my last official work day of the week. I have DEEP class training all day tomorrow and then Thursday I fly out to Virginia for the wedding which I'm totally excited for. I again did not go to the barn last night. I miss my horse terribly, but I know myself and if I go I will try and ride and do things and my back is just really not in a good place right now. Plus it's been damn ass cold lately this week and that doesn't help my pain situation as well.

Been actually kinda bored lately. I did not see Greg again last night. He has a lot going on in his life right now and I understand that, but geesh I really like seeing and talking to him. He's a super sweet guy and if things were different I know we would be dating, but like I said he has a lot to sort out right now in order to be healthy and fully functioning again. Also, the more I think about it, I probably need some down time too with all the hype from "G" and stuff, but damnit, I just have a hard gtime waiting things out, I think it is the 12yo in me that is so impatient and that wants everything NOW!!!

Work has been very busy lately. I am still trying to establish a normalized schedule and meeting new people and trying to remember names to faces, it can be overwhelming at times. I've already been up at the ass crack of dawn and drove to a middle school to watch a presentation and now I'm back at the office and getting ready to go to area schools to send out posters and flyers to spread the word to students that I will be in the schools. I do have to say though that I absolutely love my job so far and really think that this was a good change for me in the long run.

I was on call last night for the hotline and was almost certain that I would get atleast one call in the night, but alas all was quiet. I got some good sleep last night and had no issues with getting up this morning which is a good thing.

Tonight I hope to see Greg and hang out a little, I really do miss talking and seeing him. My roomie has the day off so she should be home when I get home. Have a good day everyone.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Rainy Uneventful Weekend

Sorry it's been so long since I have posted, but really don't have a whole lot to say. I did a lot of sleeping and vegging this weekend. It rained literally all weekend. My back was sore so I didn't go to the barn cause I know I would try and ride and it would just be a bad thing for me right now. My roomate had to work all weekend so she wasn't around to entertain me.

Saturday I bought my dad a couple of CD's and a card for his birthday and took the dogs over to their house for a little party. The food was awesome! My mom made two roasted chickens with stuffing and potato and vegetables and rolls and even made apple crisp for dessert! The dogs were excited to go over and visit as well.

Yesterday I went to the local mall to find a dress for the upcoming wedding in Virginia this week. I absolutely hate shopping and it totally kills me to try on things a million times. "G" asked if he could meet me there as friends and hang out while I shopped, I relented and we met up. I finally found a nice little purple thing that I thouhgt would be nice and it didn't hug all the wrong places on me. This pic is of me being silly while my roomate took my pic. These are the things we do when we're bored!
"G" and I went to lunch after shopping at his request. It was kinda awkward. He told me about all of the things he is trying to do in his life and how much he misses me and stuff, but really I know in my heart that he needs to do this on his own and I need to do my own things right now. It was sad and we both cried and stuff but atleast we are good friends first right now and are supporting one another.
I had no contact with Greg this weekend. He had his son all weekend and has come down with a bad cold, I really miss seeing and talking to him. Hopefully we can connect soon. He is on vacation all week so I'm sure he'll be around. Well that's about all. I have tentative plans to go to the barn tonight but we'll see how I feel by the end of the day. That's about all, will catch up again tomorrow.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

On Call Thursday

So tonight is the first time I will be covering the hotline with the pager, I'm kinda nervous and I'm also really tired so if I get a call or have to go to the hospital in the night it's gonna suck. Oh well I can handle it. Last night's dinner was a struggle. I really wasn't feeling too intellectual and had to pretend to listen intently to all of the scholarly conversations and nod my head and practice my active listening skills. I was glad when the dinner was over. I had been talking to Greg on and off al day and he asked me to go over to his house again to chill. I was planning on staying home and getting some shut eye but my roomie had a friend over who also has a 4yo child who is a hellian, literally.

I took a quick shower and headed out the door. "G" had picked up the dogs earlier since he wanted them for the night so I didn't have to worry about them. Greg and I hung out some and both basically collapsed from exhaustion. We take similiar anti anxiety medications so the side effects are the same and one of those is feeling tired. He gently woke me up this morning and said that he had gone outside and started my car. What a sweet heart. His son started to wake up so I headed out to go home and get ready for work. I havea busy day today going to local school and establishing drop in hrs and also scheduling presentations. I can say with certainty that I REALLY want to go to bed early tonight. Not that 11P was late last night, but I'm just dragging ass lately.

This weekend my big plan is to find a dress for the wedding in Virginia next week. I also need to do some research on the weather because I have no idea what the weather is there this time of year. I want something cute and cheap hahaha, good luck I know. I also want to either lunge or ride my horse. My back has been a little sore lately so lunging might be the way to go. He needs some work on lunging in side reins anyways so it'll be good for him. Weather is supposed to suck for the rest of the week. I think that's another reason that I'm tired because of all the changes in the weather patern. I feel like I could just fall asleep right now and not wake up till tomorrow *sigh*

But I hope to get out at a decent time this afternoon since I came in early so I can take the afternoon to chill. I was going to take the dogs to the barn to run around, but with the weather I would rather not be driving wet dogs around in the car. Hmmm, wonder what Greg is doing tonight hehehe. He really is the sweetest guy, I have never met anyone like him before, it really is amazing. Oh well, I'll keep ou all updated. Sorry my blog hasn't been very horsey lately due to the fact that I can't or do as much as I would like.

I have been reading everyone's blogs and checking on horsey progress. I enjoy reading and checking in with everyone. Talk tomorrow.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

What a Day

It feels so much like Monday today due to the holiday yesterday, I'm all confused. So I went over to Gregs house last night. I played with his son some and fell asleep on the couch when he was putting him to bed. Can I just say that it is one of the most attractive things to see a man be so loving and attentive to his son. It really just melts me.

Greg and I stayed up for a while talking and then fell asleep. I woke up at 5:30AM to go home and get ready for work. Let me also add that I stayed over at Gregs house because my roomate was supposed to have friends over late to visit because she had today off, so I needed some sleep. I let the dogs out for a nice long time this morning and got to work right on time. Due to some mix ups I ended up driving around today for no reason so now I'm just reading through curriculum stuff and getting to know all of the material that I will be presenting. I am currently listening to opera on You Tube much to the disdain of my office mate who is looking at me like I have two heads hahaha. I love opera music it relaxes me and keeps me grounded. Just killing some time now because staying at the office until the dinner at 6P. I'm already tired but hopefully after I have some good food in me I'll wake right up.

Weather is again supposed to be crappy tomorrow after a gorgeous day today, figures! The weekend also looks disgusting. Saturday I'll be going to my parents house for my dads birthday which is actually today but we are celebrating it on Saturday. I also have Possum's winter hood and belly straps in their garage that I need to get before I have him trace clipped.

My back is doing OK although it was really bothering me when I woke up this morning. "G" called me today and is finally taking steps to sobriety and self happiness, he made the call to the doctors office and is meeting with them tomorrow. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he holds out and gets the help that he needs. This could be a major step in his recovery and in his realization of depression. So that's about all I can think of right now to blog about. I'm just kinda taking every day at a time, but I can say that I love hanging out with Greg and feel as though I could really develop feelings for him, but for now I'm just playing it cool and letting the cards fall as they may. Well it's time to sign off, I just found some good music from Norah Jones that needs my attention. Talk again tomorrow.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Happy Veterans Day

It's a holiday and that means no work! But it is also a time to remember our military men and women and all of the sacrifices that they have made. Without them we might not even be able to blog and write all that we feel and think.

So had a good day. Last night was a blast. I took the dogs to the barn to run around and play with the other dogs. I also lunged Possum for about half an hour and he did really well. So after he worked I let him walk around and eat some hay. It was nice to hang with him. My roomie and I went to little local quaint bar after and met with Greg and his friend. He was having a few beers since his recent finalized divorce. He later came home with us to hang out. My roomie had some friends over so Greg and I hung out for a while down in the funeral part of the home. We talked about everything and anything. He ended up staying over and then went home in the morning with my roomie on her way to work. I went back to sleep until he called and asked if I wanted breakfast and to say that he was coming over to hang out. We talked some more about life and shit. All I have to say is that it's good just to talk to someone who has been through similiar things and share stories. We went for a drive to the barn where he checked out the literally hundreds of turkeys and I showed him Possum. It was good to share mu love of horses with someone else who really doesn't have a clue about them. he then had to go back home and do stuff so I went and got lunch with the dogs and then I went for a ride along with my roomie. For those of you who don't know she is a police officer in the next town. We had fun and even had some good calls. So I'm sitting in the PD writing this blog entry while listening to You Tube. Thinkin about going home soon to let the dogs out. Might go to Gregs house to chill out and watch some TV since he has his son tonight who might I add the cutest kid ever!

That's about all I have to share today. Can't ride tomorrow since after work all of the employees are going out to dinner with the board members which will take a while. Plus the weather has just not been great lately. it was only 40 degrees today and spitting snow. I am so not ready for winter!!!! Check in tomorrow with any more news.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Just Another Manic Monday

Well I'm a little late in writing this but I have been quite busy here at work finishing up my training and calling all of the schools trying to establish drop in hrs. Last night was pretty boring. I talked to my new male friend on the phone and he was pretty anxious about his pending divorce finalization today. He understandibly took it very hard and is emotional, as he should be. He took the day off to take care of himself and reflect. I'm hoping to connect with him tonight and show my support through this tough time.

Not going to the barn tonight, weather sucks and I have things to do around the house such as laundry and other shit. I called "G" last night to check on how he was doing. He sounded better than the day before. I want him to know that I still care very much about him and am just taking this time to myself and giving him the chance to do things on his own that ne needs to do. I'm just counting the minutes until I leave work. I've been feeling very anxious this afternoon and maybe it's because It's Monday and getting into the swing of work, who knows. Well I'm pretty boring today with not much else to say. I talked to Possum's farrier at the barn yesterday and he will be geting his winter shoes on hopefully by the end of this week. I am so not looking forward to winter since I feel like we didn't have much of a summer and all of the good riding time I have missed out on due to my back. Oh well, atleast I can still ride and should be thankful for that. Have a great rest of the day everyone, and I promise my posts will get better with pics and things, but right now too busy.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Back in the Saddle again

Well for Starters I have wireless inernet know at my house whooppee!!!! and second I rode Possum today for a good hour. My back was really sore at first but I just rode through it making sure to take lots of breaks and I'm doing OK now. Possum was really good although his bad habits like leaning in in the turns and charging towards the jumps have resurfaced. But that is fixable when I get some more strength back. It felt good to ride and I know you all are going to yell at me, but I even jumped some. It felt great and freeing and wonderful to be one with my horse again. I went with my roomie, and even though the weather was less than ideal it didn't dampen my mood. I gave him a nice long grooming and put his mid weight blanket back on since it's getting colder here again.

So I came home and gave all th everyone joins in and has no idea what they are evenb ree dogs a bath since they had decided to roll in the newly fertilized fields and throughly smelled like chicken shit! Thinga at the barn are also straightening themselves out although I am curious as to who left the nasty comments previous because really they had nothing to do with anything that has happened and I think just wanted to get a piece of the action. It's kinda like a dog fight, two dogs get into an argument and then all of a sudden they all join in and don't even know what their fighting about but like to get into it for the sake of the fight. The fact that they also posted as anonomous tells me something about their character. K, nough said.

As for the things with "G" I have decided that we need a break and I am doing my own thing. I have met a very very very nice guy and I love talking to him. Nothing else going on right now as he is at the tail end of a divorce oh and did I also tell you that he has a kid??? But there is something about this guy, he's been able to show me how I should be treated and how I really don't need to put up with the crap that I have been going through. His heart was smashed into a milion pieces when his wife cheated on him and he caught them and now she asked for the divorce. I guess lonely and broken hearts flocketogether. I am keeping all options for myself open and am focusing on have fun and enjoying life. I have a new job, a great place to live and some great friends. I need to focus on that and that only. I actually am very happy with my decision.

Week after next I am flying to Virginia to attend my cousins wedding where all of my family will also be. I am really looking forward to going even though it's only for 3 days it will be good to get away and reconnect with family. I'm still catching up with everyone's blogs and have enjoyed reading everyone's riding and horse adventures. Have a great Sunday and will catch up again tomorrow.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Back to Business

It's Friday and I'm totally looking forward to the weekend. It's been a long work week and physically by the end of it it takes it's toll on me. I want to thank all of my blogger friends again for how supportive and loving you have all been and I really appreciate it. I'm just glad to be talking about horses again!

I'm still trying to catch up on everyone's blogs so if I'm not commenting it just means I'm busy reading everyone's stuff. Things have been a little crazy in my life in the guy department. "G" and I are on a weird break at my request. I need some time away from him and have decided that if he really doesn't get some serious help I'm not going to be sticking around. This is a huge step for me, but it has also been prompted someone else who has given me some encouragement. I'm not going to blog about it too much but all I'm gonna say is that there are nice guys out there and no matter what age or stage of life you and they are in, when there is a connection it is hard to ignore that.

As for Possum. I havn't seen him too much. I'm kinda ashamed as I write this. It's just so hard for me to be at the barn and not ride or do anything, it really kills me. I alos know that Possum is gorging himself on food and probably loving his vacation. This weekend I'm def going to the barn and even if I don't ride I'll free lunge him again and play some games with him. I miss him so much and need to be with him. This Saturday I'm going to be helping a friend on free jumping her new mare who was just accepted as first premium in her dutch warmblood keuring. She's a beautiful mare with white socks and a striking face, she would make a lovely hunter after some good training. I'm looking forward to helping her and she hopes to take some good pics and videos because she plans on selling the mare.

Well that's about all I can think of for now. My back is getting stronger and stronger every day and I hope to be up to full running power in the next few weeks. Have a great day everyone and an exciting weekend.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Back Online

Wow so much has happened since I've been offline for a few weeks. I have started the new job and am working for the second week. I absolutely love it and can't wait to finish training and start the real work. My job is working at a center for sexual assault and also going into the schools and teaching kids and giving presentations while also serving drop in hours to talk to kids one on one. I will also be taking turns on the hotline and taking calls and going to area hospitals to accompany survivors of sexual assault. My co-workers are all great so I am very excited about everything.

Possum is doing wonderfully. He's running around and tearing up the place. I went to the barn last weekend and free lunged him in the arena and he was jumping jumps and having a great time. The barn wounds are mending. There was a lot of confusion, cross talking and questions that no one knew the answers to. As you can see from the comments in my last post people can be very nasty. I had to laugh when I heard about those comments because it was the wife of the man who was injured who told me about them. It's funny how people can lie so much and be so mean and vindictive when they don't even know the facts and clearly did not see the events that took place although they claim they were there and also ride at my barn. They obvioisly don't know me very well is all I have to say.

As for my back I am healing really well. I'd be lying if I said I havn't hopped on my horse bareback to walk around. My hip is also healing although it still hurts like a bastard. But I'm much more mobile and getting better everyday. It's just hard for me to be at the barn right now cause I can't ride or basically do anything. I'm thinking of trying a short ride in the arena rhis weekend and see if I can even post the trot.

Things are going really well and I am so grateful for everyone's well wishes', and prayers. I feel like I'm in a good place right now too. I also have anew good friend who I will talk about later, but for right now I'm doing well. Have a great day everyone and talk soon.

Monday, October 20, 2008

I'm Alive!

Sorry to worry everyone. Once I left work on that Friday I havn't had any internet access and had a very bad riding accident on Sunday as some of you have heard. On a positive note, I did get the job!!! Out of over 20 applicants I won them all over.

As for the accident, it was a mojor accident and poor timing and communication. As I blogged about before; we went to a boarders house for a fun day of food games and horses and it turned almost deadly during the dash race. I'm OK, I broke the T6 vertebre in my back. After 8 days I am still in a good deal of pain. I was supposed to start my new job today but simply couldn't. They were great and really understood the situation. I'm going to call my new boss Wednesday but she doesn't expect me to start until next Monday since I am still mostly bed ridden. I see a surgeon this week about possible surgery but they don't expect right now that it will be necessary.

My roomate was also involved in the accident and she didn't break anything, but she got pretty banged up and the other man involved dislocated his shoulder and has a fracture in his shoulder, I'm hoping that he heals quickly.

I'm not going to go into too much detail of the accident itself since a lot of people from the barn read this and I guess there is still some controversy but I do want to set the record straight here. At no time did I mean to put myself, my horse, other people or others at risk AT ALL!!! It was an accident that happened at about a speed of 40MPH and everything just went wrong. It was no one's fault and I believe that no one is to blame, Hell I didn't even want to be the first to race but reluctantly did so. The horses involved are doing just fine and will make a quick and speedy recovery. From what I hear Possum was galloping around his pasture which makes me happy. I will say that through this there has been some tension at the barn which makes me very very sad. I wake up almost every night and run the events through in my mind and it just keeps coming out the same. The people who I thought were my bestest friends and biggest supporters have really let me down in this time of need. I am very sad about this and have tears in my eyes as I write this. The accident happened in a matter of seconds and I had to make some quick decisions on my welfare, my horses and others. I can say that as I was approaching the horse who then backed 3 steps up directly in my path, my only thought was to not hit the horse and rider in the middle becaise it would kill them for sure. I saw a brief opening to go around as far as I could since there was also a horse racing on my left and just as we were going by the horse backed and we collided into the hind end. It sent me sailing several feet in the air doing all kinds of acrobatics and I landed on my back and then my hip and left side. I never lost consciosness and remember the entire thing. I had no idea that any other people were hurt since I was face up and could not breathe. It was so bad that the police were called because they thought I might die and kept saying things like "her pupils are fixed and dialated" and "she won't breathe". How someone could get angry or mad at a situation like that I will never know. I have spoken to all the people involved in the crash and they are doing well. But I will never forget the sickening sound of a horse colliding with another and the silence of flying through the air. My horse literally flipped over causing the horse running next to us to lose her footing and go down with my roomate. It was a mess and something that I hate to keep thinking about.

Throughout all of this my roomate and "G" have been wonderful supports. They have had to bathe me and take me to the bathroom. Help me up from bed and do things for me, I will be forever grateful for their help and support. Things with "G" are great and he has really risen to the occasion. After I was released from the hospital the next day he was there to take me to his house and help me up the stairs. He bought a brand new TV to put in the bedroom for me to watch. He gave me my medicines and rubbed my head until I fell asleep and now has been a shoulder to cry on through all of this. I guess through all of this you really know who has your back (literally). I have a lot of emotions running through me and don't even feel comfortable visiting the barn due to the tension. I miss my horse but can't even lead him out of the pasture because of my back and hip. I'm here at my parents house as this is one of the first days I can drive on my own. I don't even want to go back home and lay in bed alone listening to the silence of my phone not ring.

But just wanted to say hi to all my blogger friends and let you know that I'm expected to make a full recovery and will be back on and riding in 3 months or so. Don't know when I'll have internet again but I am getting a new laptop with my job so hopefully by next week I'll be back on. Thanks everyone for your positive thoughts, prayers and well wishes, they are greatly appreciated.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

The Tables Have Turned

Isn't life funny when things seem to change over night, or atleast it seems that way. As I have posted before "G" and I have been doing really really well lately. He is the "G" I know and love. Alcohol has not been an issue in many weeks and he is loving and nice and considerate etc... Me on the other hand is having a hard time adjusting to all this good. Isn't this what I wanted for so long? Why then am I acting like a selfish little brat who wants everything her way. I've been seeing him when it's convenient for me, and if something else comes up I'm quick to shuffle him down the list knowing that he'll be there when I'm done. It's not nice and I need to do something quick!

He actually sat me down the other night and told me how he was feeling and felt like I was shitting on him. Well I was, but I wasn't meaning to. He talked about the future long term and what he wants from me. What he was saying made perfect sense and was something that I also wanted. So why was I acting like this? I finally had the guy I wanted for so long and now I was just taking advantage of him. I thought about it for quite a while yesterday and tried to dissect my feelings. I called him from work and asked him if I could stay the night after my going away party at work, he said yes, but asked if this was what I really wanted or because I was trying to make it up to him, I told him it was what I really wanted.

The party was great last night and we even got to play some Guitar Hero which is always a blast. I finally realized at 7P that my dogs probably had their legs crossed and were waiting for me to come home so they could go pee. I rushed home and immediately let them out to do their thing. I then packed a few things, said bye to my roomate and went to "G's". I had called him earlier and he was with his friend over on the look out up the road just talking. "G" never just talks, what a change! I made sure to be very nice and keep my ears open to what he was saying last night. I have a tendency to hear what he says and then just let it go out the other ear, again not on purpose, but I need to work on that. We played with the dogs and gave them love and then laid in bed and relaxed. We talked a little more about our status and what he wants from this. I told him that I loved him and even if I am mean or rude to him, I don't mean it and sometimes it's good to have a reality check on how I'm acting. He said that he wasn't mad or anything that I've made horse plans all weekend, but just feels like he's getting passed down the to do list. I agreed that things have been hard with my job and just dealing with changes in our relationship. I'm trying so hard not to be the clingy no life person I was before, but also be independent and do things that make me happy. I need to find a balance between the two. He really understood how I was feeling and the struggles I was going through. I apologized for treating him not so nice and that he was right in calling me out on it. We were silent for a minute or so and then he rolled over and gave me a huge hug and just held me and said that he loved me. It felt good, it felt right. We turned out the lights and just let sleep come to us.

I'm at work now on a Thursday with really nothing to do, just waiting for my time to be up on Friday. The interview went really well I think yesterday. I stayed right on track with my grooming speeck, making sure to make eye contact with everyone and asking if anyone had any questions. At the end I asked them how many people they had ocme back for second interviews and they daid "Many". My heart sank as I heard that. I really want this job, and have kinda put all my eggs in one basket. I had a nightmare last night that I didn't get the job and had no money and had to move out of the apartment. I think I'm going to look for more jobs today and send in some resumes.

Tonight I'm going to the barn after work. Havn't decided yet if I'm going to ride Possum or Moonshine. Probably willd ecide when I'm changing at home getting my chaps on. I'm leaning more towards Possum, but we'll see.

I've tried not to think about this much lately, but I am in need of some better finances, bad. I'm thinking of picking up some chores at the barn to help take money off my board. I don't make that much money to begin with, and I'm been straying from my budget putting a blind eye to my checking account. I need to step it up and be responsible and really start to watch my spending. Meaning the most money I spend is on food. I hate cooking and will almost always order a sandwich or something instead of cooking. This needs to stop and next week I'm going grocery shopping and not buying another piece of food for the week.

Well that's about it for today. Nothing really interesting, just kinds talking out loud. Just kinda tired today, not because I didn't get enough sleep, but just stress and money and job ending tomorrow, it really takes a toll. But I have a fun horsey weekend to look forward to so that should be good. Have a great day everyone.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Interview Wednesday among other things

Sorry I havn't written in a while, I've been busy at work here finishing up my job duties before my last day on Friday. I can say for the first time since starting this job that I am ALL CAUGHT UP!! I did my last closing last night and now it's cleaning the office and breaking down a file, easy stuff. I have also been busy outside of work. I got a call Monday afternoon that the Sexual Assault Center would like me to come back for a second interview. I was tickled and excited. They asked me to come up with a 5-10 minute presentation on anything of my choice, they even said they didn't care if it was on baking a cake. SO ofcourse I decided to do it on something horsey, the proper way to groom a horse. I went home from work last night and washed and scrubbed all my brushes and cleaned out my brush box. I had a little caked on manure to the side of it when Possum decided to take a poop almost into the box. I figured I'd clean that up so that I didn't offend anyone. Sometimes I take regular "civilians" for granted and their not as used to manure as us horse folks.

I got some note cards together, not that I need them, but to make sure I stay on track and focused. I'm handing out a little diagram of a horse with the basics labeled like hoof, wither, tail, ears, face etc... Again wanted to dumb it down to that the least horsey person could follow along and understand what is being talked about. So that is at 3:15 today and I'm a little nervous but excited. As long as I keep my focus and talk like I normallly do I'll be just fine. Wish me luck anyways....

Monday night after work I wasn't going to ride since I was still recovering from this cold, but my roomie was going and I couldn't resist since I feel like I've been neglecting Possum lately and I knew I would be busy this week. PLus I wanted to give the dogs a chance to run around and play. I gave Possum a good brushing and was amazed at how fuzzy his hair had gotten in just a little under a week. We were racing the daylight so I did a nice long warm-up for him to loosen up and then went into our normal routine. We worked on some flying changes and he was great. I did a lot of transitions and then we started trotting and then cantering little fences working on adding in a stride and then taking a stride out of a line. He did really well. Then at the end my roomie and I for kicks took turns jumping out of the arena which is lined with PVC poles at about 3ft and a little. He did great and sailed right over it no problems. I let him cool out for a while and gave him a good rub down and then let him loose to eat grass while I put stuff away and talked with people.

I have decided last minute that I'm going with a friend on Saturday to a local club show. It's fun, no real pressure and just an open type show with some little jumping in the afternoon. I thought it would be a fun end of the show season event. Not sure if I'm bringing Possum or Moonshine, we'll find out tomorrow night when I go to the barn and ride.

Then Sunday we are all trailering our horses to a boarders house close to the barn. Every year she has a little cook out and games at her house. She makes jumps in her field and has a dirt road for the yearly race on horseback. She also has miles and miles of beautiful trails. It's a potluck lunch an so far the weather is looking good. It'll be a really fun time to visit with barn people and their families. Anyone related to the barn is invited even if they don't ride or own a horse.

SO I havea busy week and weekend end. The good thing is that I have all next week off regardless of what happens this week. I'm looking forward to a break. My roomate is possibly looking into a new saddle and either Wednesday or Thursday of next week we're going to Dover Saddlery in NH to try saddles and look and drool over the items in the huge store. I love that place and I don't mind the 2 and a half hr drive to get there. I just can's spend ANY money because I'm broke! I still need to pay board and that's gonna have to wai tuntil next pay period. Oh man I hope I get this job. Thank goodness this little show on Saturday is super cheap.

So that's about it for today. I'm just finishing up here at work and going to clean my office which desperately needs it. Dreaming of being at the barn instead. Oh, after work tonight we are all going to a co0workers house for a little going away party for myself and the other worker here so I'll have dinner there. I'm also planning on bringing Phineous inon Friday for my last day, what are they gonna do, fire me??!! Have a great day everyone. Now that read this post I can't believe how busy I actually am. I guess I kinda have a life and it revolves around my horse and animals, I love it.

Monday, October 6, 2008

Ride Em Cowgirl! (literally)

What a great weekend I had! Despite this nasty cold still hanging around I had a blast through the coughing and hacking. Friday night was a hoot. We went to the haunted ski area and it was so much fun and scary that I was literally hanging off my roomate. I screamed so hard that it did not help my cold or my voice at all. We then went out for ice cream after and then drove home where I basically collapsed from exhaustion. I slept in my old room on my twin bed, it was a tight squeeze with me and three dogs but we kept each other warm.

The next moring I got up early to help my mom with my cousins wedding shower and get ready. The shower was OK, not the highlight of my weekend, but I got through it. Then we headed to the fair where I bet on some of the races, met up with some of my racing friends and hung with my family. My family didn't really walk around and see much so I felt like I hadn't seen everything, I had plans to go back the next day with someone or even by myself. I ended up picking some winners at the races and went through only the swine barn, but did pig out on food. I had pizza, apple crisp, cotton candy and my favorite french fries on the grounds. By 7P I was tired and missing "G" as I had promised to stay at his house Saturday night. I had to walk basically the mile back to my parents truck as they were going to leave later in my moms car. I stopped and switched to my car at my parents, packed the dogs and all of our stuff and drove the hour to my apartment. I then packed a few things and went to "G's" to spend the night. I was so tired and I went right to sleep as he was still watching TV. He was so sweet and rubbed my back and just held me all night. We got up kinds early Sunday and went to breakfast with my family before they drove and flew back home. "G" and I then drive to the fair where we spent a really good day together. We have some similiar interests so we went through all the barns and went in some expo buildings and then in the evening we watched the truck pulls which is always a favorite of mine. It marks the end of the fair and the fair season here in Maine.

Now your probably wondering about my pics. This is a steer named Hercules. I was talking to a man in one of the barns for a while and we got to talking about riding cows. He asked me to try it and hop on and I couldn't resist. The steer weighed 2,654 lbs. He was a gentle giant with some amazing strength. He was a very good boy at 4 yrs old and it was a pleasure to say that I rode him. I was smiling ear to ear and "G" took some of these shots from my phone. What a difference in the gaits as well riding one of these guys. It was hard to not use my legs in steering and using the Gee and Haw commands which I am not used to. Just wanted to share these pics with you guys. I had so much fun. Now hopefully today or tomorrow I'll find out if I get the job I interviewed for or not. Keep your fingers crossed. SO my plans today are to get the rest of my work done, go hone tonight and maybe see my horse since I feel like I'm neglecting him and do some laundry as it has piled up suddenly. Hope everyone had a good weekend to. I'm off to work

Friday, October 3, 2008

Ready.. Set...Go!

This pic is of Moonshine and I last fall. This is one of my favorite pics of us. It was a crisp fall day and we we were just out cantering in the outdoor ring.

That's how I'm feeling about my upcoming weekend, and it's good to be busy. I went to the barn last night and let Possum out to graze after he had his dinner. I took the opportunity to give him a good brushing while he was eating. Even though he was still clean and fluffy underneath, he did have some dirt on his coat. I picked his feet and let him be. I hung out with my horsey friends and then went inside the owners house to watch the video that was taken of a show a few months ago. This was the show where Possum galloped around and tried to jump a jump when we were doing our ending courtesy circle.

Well after watching the video, it was much worse riding it then watching it. Sure there were a few chip ins and times when he would get speedy, but nothing like the speed show it felt like on top of his back. I felt a little better about our progress over the summer even though I didn't show him nearly as much as I wanted to for the sheer lack of funds. After watching the video I loaded up the dogs and we drove to our hometown. I spoke with "G" on the phone and he decided to come over when he got home and took a shower and asked that I order pizza and he'll pick it up on his way. He was being so nice and sweet and I know we're both in the same boat financially that I ordered it and paid for it. He came over shortly after and was all nice saying that I didn't have to pay for it and he was going to. It just felt like the right thing to do. I kinda got a rough nights sleep due to three dogs, one cat and a boy in my bed. I may complain about it now, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I love all of my animals and they love me too. We're just a big happy family. I went about my normal routine this morning of letting the girls out to pee first and then taking a shower and getting dressed and then taking all of them out for their normal session. I refilled their food and water dishes, gave them each a kiss bye and left for work.

I have a busy day ahead of me. I'm finishing up everything at work, need to get out a little early to switch laundry over and pack all of mine and the dogs stuff for staying the night at my parents house. I'm meeting my roomie at the police dept. and then we're going to my parents house, dropping the dogs off and going to the haunted ski area. AFter that we'll probably grab a late dinner and then I'll go to my parents house and Holli will drive home.

The next morning is my cousins shower and then we're all going to the fair together. Saturday night the dogs and I are staying at "G's" and then Sunday I'm going to the fair to go to the races. It's a weekend packed full, but it's all things that I enjoy. I told Possum last night that he's getting the weekend off and to rest and eat, I think he'll take my advice. Then next week is my last week of employment and then I have a week off to relax and destress. I also should know about the job early next week which I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I have also been toying with the idea of attending a local jumper and equitation show. I usually like to end the show season wil a bang and just have fun and do our thing. I think more seriously about it when I've paid all of my bills for the first of this month and see what's up.

So have a great weekend everyone, the weather is supposed to be nice here and I'm going to tke full advantage. SO what are all your plans for the weekend? does it involve any riding?

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Great start to the day.....

Well I feel worse today than yesterday sick wise. I went home last night and vacuumed the apartment and did laundry and then laid in my bed for the rest of the night. My throat was burning and my chest felt like it had a 50 pound weight on it. I didn't even have thoughts of going to the barn. Myy roomie came home and felt bad for me so gave me a fresh picked apple that she got at work. Then "G" called me and heard how miserable I sounded. He said that he would take a shower, drive back to work where he had some medicine and then drive to my apartment to get it to me because he loves me that much. This is a HUGE gesture from him. He showed up about an hour later and took care of me and put me to bed. He even stayed the night with me and all my germs. I'm really starting to think that things might be going in a good direction for once.

I got up fairly early because I have a busy day here at work. I got some tea on the way to a visit to try and get my voice back and dislodge some of the gunk in my throat (I know, Yuck!) I made it through the visit, got some more tea to bring back to the office and go to check my mail and find that I have won a plaque from cdncowgirl . What a suprise that was. I have been so busy lately that I hardly nominated anyone. I just wanted to take this time to thank all of my great and wonderful blog friends. Never do I think that people care much about my story of horses and men, and never would I imagine that someone would care enough to nominate me for a prize. It really does make me feel great and restore my faith in humanity.

I knew there was a reason that I love horse people so much. Not to say that all my blog readers are horse people per say, but what a great bunch of folks I have for support out there in internet land. I'm going through another tough transition in my life right now. It seems that once I'm over one hurdle another one pops up. But with my added supports and techniques learned throughout the journey I know I can handle pretty much anything that life throws at me.

I have an interview today at 3P. Even though my voice is shot and my nose is plugged I'm going to go and do my best. I have more visits today but am going to look at the positive side of things. Even clients that I tell I'm leaving really have a genuine reaction and ask me how I'm going to be. I tell them I'm going to be fine and that they will see me out in the community. You never really seem to know how many lives you've touched unless something like this happens. Usually many people don't know until they die or have a huge illness. I;m lucky, I only have a cold, I have my animals and family and internet friends and barn friends all cheering me on.

My brother is in town from Hollywood California and staying with my parents for a week to go to the www.fryeburgfair.com A fair that we grew up next to, the largest fair in Maine. Friday we're going to a ski area for a haunted house and have to take the chair lift up in the dark to the top of the mountain where all the spooky thing sare, which sounds like a blast and my roomate is going with me. http://www.cranmore.com/info/events/calendarevent.ghoullog.item.asp I have a lot to look forward to.

I don't know if I'll make it to the barn tonight, It's raining here again but the outlook for the rest of the week looks good. I'm gonna get as much rest as I can I have a busy weekend coming up. My cousin from Virginia is coming to Maine to my parents house to have her wedding shower. She's only 23 and I can't believe she's getting married. She and her finance really are in love and I hope only the best for them. After the shower we're all going to the fair. I'm going to bet on some of the STB races and hopefully see some of my race friends too. It'll be good to see some of my family I only get to visit with once in a while. Have a great day everyone, and remember even when your down or feel like your all alone, your not. Here's the song for the day.


Tuesday, September 30, 2008

pics at the show....

For anyone interested and wanting to do a little work you can see some of the pics on a photographers website of Possum and I.

Go to www.harnessracingphotography.com

Then select the Maine Medals gallery.

After that go to the outdoor section

The to the modified adult Medal and modified adult equitation.

You can't miss us, he's the whitesh appy with his earls always pinned back. SOme are so so and some are just bad. Tell me what you think. You can also see from the pics how rainy and gross out it was that day.

Medal Finals Re-Cap

The word of the day this past sunday was WET. It literally poured the entire day. Everyone and everything was soaked. All of the squeaky clean horses were covered and mud and rain. Braids wee dripping wet and my helmet was draining rain down my front. I have to admit that it was miserable show weather. All I wanted to do was get dry and snuggle in my bed at home.

There were a ton of riders despite the weather. I believe our barn had 9 riders or so. Everyone did really well. Possum and I had a judged warm-up first of all (in the pouring rain) we did pretty well and got 8th out of like 20. Then in the equitation class I thought that we had a pretty solid course, nothing to win the class or anything but we didn't get pinned which I was a little bummed about. I took Possum for a little walk around the grounds to get my composure and game face on. I then went in the ring for the first round of the medal and I was too concentrated and fierce that I just couldn't find the right pace. I ended with a dismal score of 66. It we tense to see if I would even make the call back with a score like that, well I barely squeaked into the second round. I was determined todo better. Possum and I went in there and put in a really solid round and earned a score of 76 whick is good, not spectacular, but solid. We ended up placing 7th in the Medal which I was OK with.

"G" came to watch and support me Sunday afternoon in the rain. It was nice to have him there. He wiped off my boots and gave me leg ups. He then left before they pinned the class to go home and let the dogs out.

After we left the show grounds we were all exhausted. We raced home, unpacked, unloaded the horses and went home and literally collapsed. I still have a pile of clothes and stuff laying on my bedroom floor. My roomie and I passed out. Iwoke up yesterday morning with a fever and feeling like shit. My head was spinning and all I wanted to do was sleep some more. I seriously think something is wrong with me and am seriously considering having a blood test done or something because I am so tired all the time.

I called into work and literally spent the entire day in bed. I slept until noon, watched TV for like an hour and went back to bedfor the rest of the day. I got up this morning still feeling like crap but atleast didn't have a fever. I know I'm sick from spending over 12 hrs in the rain Sunday. SO I'm back i nthe office finishing up work stuff.

I do have an interview tomorow for a job so I'm looking forward to that. Gonna get home tonight, have some soup and then go to bed and hope that tomorrow I feel better.

I do have to say that I was very proud of Possum. Despite the mistakes and things that I made he did really well. He wasn't rushing, and he was listening and did really well. I know we were both miserable in the weather but for our last year in the modified adult I think we did OK despite all the things going on. Will check in tomorrow, but am tired and need to get work done now. Hope everyone had a good weekend and I'm going to rustle up some pics from the rainy finals and someone even got videos of us so when I get them hopefully I can figure out how to do it.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Ahhhh, now we're talking...

These pics are not of me (I wish) but their a good portrayal of moring at horse shows, and the one with the little dog was just too cute.

There is nothing like a good ride on your horse to make the world a better place. I rushed out of work last night, scooped up the dogs and went to the barn to ride my horse. I was actually not looking forward to it as it seemed like just one more thing to do on my list. I gave Possum a good brushing and tacked him up as it is the time of year that daylight is fading and pretty sooon it'll be dark when I get out of work.

Anyways so I did a nice long warm-up and others were riding in the ring so I was able to rubber neck and watch all the excitement. Possum was very quiet and responsive. Our warm-up went great and then we started trotting jumps, his and mine's least favorite thing. Usually after a trot jump he will take the momentum and try and canter after, even if I ask him to break down he will insit. Last night he calmly trotted jumps and came back down easily to trot the next jump in the line. He was quiet and steady as could be. I was able to just sit up and work on my position.

The we started cantering courses and working onour flying changes. He was wonderful. I gave him lots of praise and pats. His canter was a steady 1,2, rhythm making it oh so easy to see spots and make every striding in a line. I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. After only 30 minutes of riding I let him end because everything was literally perfect. I stripped off his saddle and boots and let him loose to eat in the yard as a reward. It really ended the day on a good note. If we have a canter and courses like that at the Medals, we definately have a chance of doing very well. I then watched my roomie ride and they also did very well. She is working on getting her horse more steady and not so hot and excited. Her horse loves to go and jump and slowing it all down and making it look like figure skating instead of ice hockey has been a challenge. Her horse is an excellent jumper, but lacks some on style and grace, all of the aspects of a good hunter. But last night they were on and it just flowed. I love that feeling. SO we both left the barn in good moods and renewed fait in our riding ability and our horses.

I met up with "G" at a little diner place and had chicken fingers for dinner. I went home and took a nice long hot shower and got in bed with the dogs and watched Animal PLanet until 11P. We have visiting hrs at the funeral home today at 4 so I dropped the dogs off at "G's" this morning before going to work. We also have more visiting hrs tomorrow from 12-4 so I have to make sure we're not around for that, which won't be hard since we'll be at the barn getting ready for Sunday.

Speaking of Sunday, the weather report is not good. We're supposed to get 5inches of rain this weekend and the more as time goes by, the more rain we're getting on Sunday. There are 2 rings going on at the finaks, one in the indoor and on outside, this year they switched my division to riding outside, oh joy! So pack the goloshes and rain gear cause it's gonna be a wet one. Please wish us luck and hope that I can keep my spirits up. SHowing is supposed to be fun right??? JUst too much stress going on in my life right now. I'm gonna go to the show Sunday, watch everyone else and cheer them on, hang out with my horsey friends and then put in a good round in my class. Those are my goals. Also, this is the facility that the show is being held at, this is the Medals website and you can click on Pine Land to see the place. It's goreous! http://www.mainemedalfinals.com/

Have a great weekend everyone and be safe.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Another day close to joblessness

OK, I know the title sounds all doom and gloom, but really I'm OK with it. The more I think about it and the more I finish things up at work here, the more I realize that I have been burning myself out in this line of work and a break is what I need. I did get a job prospect yesterday from Sexual Assault Crisis Center as an educator position going into the schools and local collages and doing presentations and talking about sexual assault. SOmething that I would love to do. I love doing presentations and talking to people. SO I need to get on the ball with that this week because they are scheduling interviews for next week.

I did not ride last night as I posted yesterday. I went to the little jewelry party and it was short and fun, just the way I like it. I went home after and played with the dogs and let them all out and then "G" came and we went out locally for a quick dinner. I just had a greek salad since I felt like I had been grazing on snacks all day. We went back home and loved on the dogs. I went and got my cat inside for his nightly curfew and we all curled up together (literally) and went to sleep. HAving three dogs, one cat and one man in the bed with me is quite a squeeze, but we all love it.

Hated getting up this morning. The dogs helped me to get out of bed, take a quick shower and let them outside to do their thing. Tonight I am riding. I must get a good ride in. I just heard the weather it we're supposed to have torrential downpours all day tomorrow and Saturday with some clearning Sunday. It's gonna be a wet and soggy show Sunday and getting ready Saturday is going to be a pain. I think I might douse Possum with shampoo and then just let him loose to hang out in the rain, like a shower to wash the shampoo off, yea right! Somehow he would get dirty and my plan would backfire.

Update on Jetta. She is doing wonderful. No accidents in the house, she does not need to be crated or confined, she has free roam of the house as do my other dogs. She is a bit snappy when it comes to eating. She is definately a big dog trapped in a little dogs body, but she loves "G" and I. I can see she is going to be a daddy's girl for sure.

My life right now is just consumed with finishing up this job and looking for another. I am so tired all the time. I'll be glad when this show is over on Sunday because that marks the end of your show season until January.

So I went to Walmart last night to buy dog food. I have alwaya fed my dogs Iams and had really good luck with it. A trainer once told me that Iams has gone downhill a little, especially when they struck a deal with Walmart. I just bought the new food they have out and it is more expensive than normal and I look at the ingredients and still the first things is chicken meal. Not chicken or any other real thing, but meal. I have looked into the past of making my own dog food from meat and chicken and pasta and veggies, but just didn't have the time to do that. What does everyone else feed for dog food. As a treat I will buy the Beneful bowls and let them have some wet food which they devour.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Ramblings on a Wednesday

Pic of dogs running through tall grass. Not my dogs and not as tall as the grass last night, but you get the picture.

I have to admit that I had a tough day yesterday. I was in the office the entire day and working onthe compputer. My neck started to hurt, my back ached and then I started to get a head ache. The words began to swirl on the screen and I was quickly running out of steam. I left work at about 5P and went to "G's" house to pick up the dogs. I really wasn't feeling well and my chest was all tight and the back of my head ached. When I got to his house the dogs wre happy to see me as always and we went for a long walk through the woods exploring sose of the new logging trails and coming out to a field. The field was quite large and had not been mowed all summer. The grass and golden rods were taller than me. I laughed outloud as I saw the dogs bounding through the grass like deer and trying to see where they were going. Eventually we followed some of the many deer paths and came to the edge of the woods to "G"s" house. The dogs had fun and I didn't feel so guilty about not going to the barn since they got some time to run and play and go to the bathroom. I still wasn't feeling well but it was good to be outside. I drove back home and basically plopped on the bed and watched TV. My roomie came home shortly and I really was shaky and started to spin and my palms were sweating. I was actually afraid that I was going to faint. "G" was also concerned and I told him it was probably just my reaction to all the stress. My roomie was great and went out and bought me a bowl of soup and a dessert. I ate it all and started to feel better.

I took the dogs out again to pee and do their thing and felt like I had more energy. I went and brushed my teeth and got ready for bed and just watched animal planet until about 10:30 and fell asleep.

I feel better today. I don't know what my problem was, I'm sure it's just being overwhelmed from being stressed. That's why I'm glad that I have my dogs to cheer me up and make me laugh. They really are the greatest. Tonight I HAVE to ride after work. My roomate is also coming up after she gets out. "G" has also offered to take me out to eat when I'm done riding and I think I might take him up on the offer. It's just hard going to a job that I know will end Oct. 10th. Just weird for me to think about. SO hope everyone is having a good day. I really need to get focused on this weekend and prepare for the big show. I think Possum and I will be ready although it's supposed to rain all day Saturday so getting ready and bathing in the rain is going to suck, especially since I left my rain coat at the fair racetrack and now I don't have one. I'll get by. I just hope to resport on Monday morning on a good show and our good placing. One step at a time Molly.

OOps, I just realized that I have a little party to go to tonight after work to a co workers house. Shit! I totally forgot that today was Wednesday. Ohwell, the barn can wait. It's not like Possum is going to forget how to jump. Oh darn, I hate when I forget about things and feel totally disorganized. I need to somehow get my brain in gear and get focused. Anyways, at;east I'll be all dressed and ready to eat after the mini-party. OK check in tomorrow gang. Have a good day.
Possum and I at the Maine Medal Finals 2 years ago. We got 11th place. Last year we got 6th in the Medal and 4th in the equitation. So hopefully this year we can end it with a bang.