Friday, August 7, 2009

A Year in Review

So it's my birthday today. I am fast approaching the big 30. I am turning 28 today. A lot of things happened in my 27th year and I have learned ALOT! I'm not gonna lie and say that I'm not atleast a little depressed at where my life is right now. But at the same time I really have nothing to worry about. My 27th year started out with getting back with "G" and trying to work things out. This obviously didn't happen and then I moved onto Greg. You all know how that panned out and then Nick and I started hanging out. There's been some happy times and a lot of down times with tears. When my parents were my age they were married, had built a house and had 2 kids already. They are still married, still live in the same house and still have two kids who are now grown. I wonder what path the universe has in store for me......

Some of the good things of my 27th year have definately been with my animals. All the dogs, my horse and even my cat are doing awesome. They are all healthy and happy. Possum and I are progressing in our riding. We did fairly well at the medals last fall and have been riding consistently throughout the year. We even got so bored and bold this winter that we hooked up a rope and a tube and hauled people around in the snow, that was fun!

Even though I havn't been able to attend as many shows this year as I have wanted due to lack of funds, we have been doing alright, especially with only competing in the 2'9-3' division. The Downeast in June was a good show for us, and luckily the Medals this year will be held at the same show grounds and the footing is great. Here is a pic from the show in June.

Last summer at around this time my roomie and I were settling into our new apartment above the funeral home. It has now been over a year and I still love where I live. It's huge and comfortable and most importantly their dog friendly. I also got my nose pierced this winter which is my first piercing ever.

This year was also the year that I broke my back which was really tough. Not only breaking it, but all of the stuff at the barn and just having it be one huge accident was horrible. This is something that I will never forget and I will also never forget to thank my lucky stars that both Possum and I made it through with only bumps and bruises and were able to make a full recovery.

This year has been one of growth and stretching my legs. Trying to be comfortable in my own skin and also recovering from broken relationships and a broken back. I'm connecting with friends and learning to just relax and have fun. The just relax part needs some work. As a person with high anxiety, relaxing is not always easy unless your sleeping hahaha.

So my goals for year 28 are as follows: Doing my own thing. Focusing on myself and not trying to force things to happen ie. boys. Fun Fun Fun. Not someone else's idea of fun, but what is fun for me. Be that going to the barn , or singing outside my house or doing cartwheels and handstands on the baseball field (what my roomie and I did last night after practice). I also want to focus on losing weight and being healthy. I'm doing well with toning up and being more physical and shedding some lbs. I hope to be fairly slim by Thanksgiving time if all goes well. When I feel better about myself physically, I also feel better mentally. I have more confidence, can wear the clothes that I want and feel healthier. Save some money. This is a hard one for me since I don't make a lot to begin with and usually after all my real life bills it all goes to the animals. I do want to put some away into retirement, even if it's onle a few bucks a week. Hanging with my friends, both barn and otherwise. But there is nothing like your barn friends. We all live breathe and speak horses. There's nohing better than a big group of horse people (who all get along) and having a good time.

The next big thing I'm looking forward to is the Medals in September. It's going to be a weekend filled with horses, friends and showing and I am bound and determined to have the time of my life. No boys or other stressors are going to get me down. There will be jumper classes and of course the medals. We will be camping out at the grounds and will have a blast. But until then, It's just a day at a time, an hr at a time and even a minute at a time.


Shadow Rider said...

Happy Birthday!

~*~Lysh~*~ said...

Happy Birthday! I hope that this year is a great one for you!!

Adventures of a Horse Crazed Mind said...

Great review of the year! Sounds like you have a great idea of where you want to go from here- which is half the battle. Hope you have a great day today! Found this today in someone's comments and have it "copied" so will leave it here for you...

Just For Today I will live one day only, forgetting yesterday and tomorrow, and not trying to solve the whole problem of life at once.

Just For Today I will be unafraid of life and death; unafraid to enjoy the beautiful and be happy. People are as happy as they make up their minds to be.

Just For Today I will adjust myself to what is, and try not to make everything over to suit me. If I cannot have what I like, I will try to like what I have.

Just For Today I will be agreeable, cheerful, charitable, do my best, praise people for what they do, not criticize them for what they cannot do; and if I find fault, I will forgive it and forget it. I will try not to improve or regulate anybody except for myself.

Just For Today I will have a plan. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have one. It will save me from worry, hurry and indecision.

Just For Today I will get off my nerves and not get on theirs. I will appreciate them for what they do and what they are.

Just For Today I will not show it if my feelings are hurt.

Just For Today I will find a little time for quiet, to relax and to realize what life is and can be, and get a better perspective of myself.

Just For Today I will look at life with fresh eyes and discover the wonder of it; I will know that as I give to the world so the world will give to me.

SillyPony said...

A very Happy Birthday to you! Having actually turned that "big 30" this summer I can sympathize with what you are feeling. At my age my parents were also married with two kids, but my mom had to give up her horses when she got married, so there's that. When I was 21 I was convinced I was with the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with, so finding myself 30 and single and not even in a relationship is tough to stomach. But I have a good career going and a good horse and those are two things I've worked very hard for.

Sometime between 25 and 30 I made a realization: there is only so much control you can have over your life. What can I control? I have some control over my career and making sure I do a good job at work. I have some control over my horse life. I can do things my way, I can work hard and try to ride better. What can't I control? Boys. I have very little control over getting OR keeping a boy. So I decided to focus on the two that I had some control over. It's tough to think that 10 years ago I thought I'd be married within a year or so, and that another 10 years could slip away just as fast. The other BIG thing we have a lot of control over, is how we feel today. Take a cue from our four-legged friends: do they worry about tomorrow? Do they think about what it would be like to be a little faster or a little more popular in the turnout? Nope. They live for today. Just like Adventures of a Horse Crazed Mind suggests: one day at a time.

I try to make a point at the end of each day to recall at least one thing that made me happy. So far today I'm jazzed about finding floor lamps for my office for only $10 a piece at Target! It's a little thing, but it's healthier than dwelling each night on the fact that I'm single! Hang in there, thirty is a lot like 27 was, actually!

cdncowgirl said...

Happy Birthday! Best wishes for a HAPPY year :)

Laura said...

Happy birthday!!! Here's to lots of fun with good friends in your 28th year!!!

Leah Fry said...

A day, an hour, a minute, a moment — take it however you have to. You're doing just fine. And happy birthday!

Laughing Orca Ranch said...

Sounds like you've had an outstanding year, even with the few wrenches thrown in.
I hope that the next year is even better...but with a lot less broken stuff (eek!)

Happy Birthday to you!